I went to McDonald’s because I had a buy one, get one. So we drove up and ordered: one Quarter Pounder Meal, two Big Macs, one cheeseburger and a small fry. This is what we hear from the speaker… We’re out of Big Mac buns. Would you like a Big Mac on a Quarter Pounder Bun? Whatever. McDonald’s being out of Big Mac buns is like your corner ghetto mart being out of Magnum 40s and Kools. Anyway, 40 fucking minutes later… I’m at the booth handing in my coupon… this 36-year-old reject from a 1992 Wu-Tang Clan video says he didn’t hear me say I had a coupon. So what if he didn’t fucking hear me, I fucking have one in my bloody hand. I guess he also didn’t hear me saying he should have gotten his GED 18 years ago. Anyway, this fucking French fry jockey is obviously deaf and dumb. If I wanted this level of service I could have easily gotten a Wendy’s finger chili, Taco Bell E. Coli or a Burger King whopper case of diarrhea. Suffice to say I feel like I just got my poo-pushed in by the Hamburglar. So next time your at the McDonald’s drive-thru bring your TEC-9 and spray all the retards in the kitchen and drive away humming I’m lovin’ it.

NOTE: No minimum wage retards were harmed by this rant any more than by their mother’s nine-month coke, speed and alcohol binge.