There are literally hundreds of religions in the world. Every single person that embraces one of these religions feels that their god is the only god. Additionally, each religion says that there is no room for the god of another religion and non-believers are going to some really bad place when they die. Anybody else find a bit of problem here? Are we to believe that at the very least, some 4 billion people are wrong about religion?? That’s a pretty bold statement, and I’m not fucking buying it.

Here is a breakdown of the top 6 religions and the world population percentage of each.

33% Christians
20% Muslim
13% Hindu
6% Chinese Universists
6% Buddhist
5% Worshipers of Steve Jobs
.2% Judaism

But wait a second…that’s only 83% of the worlds 6,626,666,292 (approx) people. Where are the others? The last 20% of the world’s population is composed of believers in Spirits and Deities (Shintoists, Pagans, Tribal Religions), Aethiests and Agnostics, and a bunch of other weird shit that I don’t really care about. Judaism represents a relative very small percentage of the population, but they are listed as an honorable mention because Manischewitz sent the editors here at Angryromanian.com a case of kosher wine in response to the “Mel Gibson is a Fucking Nut-Case” post.

The truth about the gods is that all of the gods co inhabit heaven and fight over the majority following of souls on earth. Every 500 years, they have a no holds barred fight for the title supreme ruler of the world.

The below bracket shows the white knuckle results from the past fight.

The projected winner of this upcoming fight is underdog Apple CEO Steve Jobs, who oddly enough isn’t even dead yet. Nonetheless, the Apple corporation continues to gain followers with each clever electronic device is releases to the public. As prophesied, he will die a Martyr somewhere in the year 2011, stoned to death with his own iPods, iButtplugs, iPhones, and the upcoming iGods by followers of the Microsoft faith. Upon his return to Earth, he will lay to waste the Vista users, and Linux/Mac will reign supreme.

~Ruko