Retail Sales - Fast Track to Eternal Damnation
There is only one thing worse than working in retail, and that is talking about it with friends and family. We have to deal with the unwashed masses all day. We deal with all sorts of abuse from flat faced trailer trash, know it all Asians, “lets make a deal” Indians, and, a computer salesperson’s nightmare, old people.
So getting back to my point; retail workers are masochists. After eight hours fighting the urge to choke slam the next redneck that insists on buying an RCA 32″ tube over a Samsung 32″ LCD because, “that there screen looks bigger”, we promptly head to a bar or the home of a coworker, and spend hours rehashing all the negative encounters of the day, week or year. We then stumble home at three in the morning to catch four hours of sleep before doing it all over again.
Although these little get-togethers are generally bad for our health, both mentally and physically, they occasionally yield positive results. The other night we were talking about selling extended warranties. It’s bad enough we have to humor the retards who darken out big box doorways, but we also have to try to sell them a warranty on the landfill fodder they are purchasing. Some buy it, most don’t. There are a million-and-one reasons customers will give for not buying a warranty. Here is a sampling of few of the most frequent/humorous we have heard over the years. This was recorded at a late night bitch fest, so any slurring, stutrettering, or excessive laughter can be blamed on Captain Morgan.
If you are in the industry I’m sure you can relate, if not, please consider brushing up on your warranty refusal rhetoric. And remember, there is a direct correlation between how you treat your salesperson and how Ruko and the rest of the warehouse staff treat that $2400 TV you just refused to buy a warranty on.
