For those of you who live under rocks and such, Heath Ledger passed away on January 22, 2008. His bed was sprinkled with sleeping pills. Police have not yet released the official cause of death.

In other news, my neighbor planted some bulbs this morning. Hopefully we will see a nice array of tulips and such come the spring time.

Seriously though. Heath Ledger was an okay actor for being an Australian wanker. His films included a movie about a knight that wasn’t a knight but became a knight in the end, a broken mountain, a movie about Grim Reapers, and a movie called Candy about drugs. Go figure.

The more pressing issue surrounding his death is that the release of the movie Dark Knight will now be put on the back burner. Ledger, who had been cast and was already finished filming as “The Joker”, is now dead. This wouldn’t be a problem (as we saw with the move The Crow) however the marketing and advertisement folks at Warner Brothers are worried that this image carries a very negative (and ironic) connotation. So. My mom made a casserole once.

Oddly enough, the upcoming movie Dark Knight is intended to be a remake of the 1989 masterpiece Batman. The post production Dark Knight is a sequel to Batman Begins, which is really a prequel to the original Batman, which makes Dark Knight a mathematical recursive loop. Mathematicians at Stanford University have released a statement saying “the recursive Batman loop is in no way connected to the death of Heath Ledger”.

The original Joker of the 1989 Batman was played by Jack Fucking Nicholson. His performance as “The Joker” is widely considered as his best, or maybe his appearance in Stanley Kubrick’s The Shining was his best…either way, he was pretty fucking good. If I were Jack Nicholson, I would be pretty pissed that some Shrimp on the Barbie bastard was trying to outdo me. Maybe Jack Nicholson killed Heath Ledger…(DUN DUN DUN!).

In Hollywood, there are several actors which you never, ever try to duplicate. It is an unwritten rule. I know you are thinking “but Ruko…how the fuck do you know anything about Hollywood?”. Well, the truth is, my eldest cousin is a big-wig for Universal Studios. If I owned a television, I could probably find a show, movie, or program on television every hour that he was directly affiliated with. That aside, he is in the know, which makes me a little bit in the know.

Actors such as Al Pacino, Robert Dinero, Paul Newman, Robert Duvall, and Jack Fucking Nicholson are untouchables; trying to remake something they did really pisses off the Hollywood gods. When the Hollywood gods get pissed, they release upon us a swarm of chick-flicks, another Star Wars Episode, or a plethora of not so new and not so exciting reality television series that sweep the country. Mr. Ledger should have known better, and the Gods of awesome movies have killed him with lightning bolts and shit.

Eh. Either way, I am pissed that I didn’t put Heath on my Celebrity Death Pool list. He would have been a money addition.